A Common Delusion

Hey everyone,

Welcome to the MindShift weekly newsletter were I write a short thought provoking letter, and where I highlight recent deep dive articles that I posted.

Today we are focusing on….

Naval Ravikant’s Quote:

The fundamental delusion — there is something out there that will make me happy and fulfilled forever. Naval Ravikant

This highlights the most common error that people make: we all think there is something out there that will make us happy, and fulfilled—forever.

It’s a reliance on the external.

We all seek external validation: success, social status, power, money, popularity etc. Seeking this validation is normal and okay to a degree.

It starts to become negative when we define our inherent value by the only the outside factors.

Social media and modern society have increased these feelings because everything is quantifiable now.

“You have x amount of followers”

“You have x amount of subscribers”

“You worked at x company according to your LinkedIn”

Our entire life can be analyzed through these new online mediums. Now this advancement is neither good nor bad, its how we use them that determines their impact.

But the moral of the story is— it is up to us to fight the temptation to rely on external validation. The tricky part is that we aren’t always aware we are doing it.

If you catch yourself saying:

“Once I make x amount of money I’ll be happy”

“Once I get married I’ll be happy”

“Once I get that job I’ll be happy”

You are deferring your happiness to an external situation that you often have little control over.

Finding Happiness Over Time

To me, the most important lesson of Naval’s quote is the focus on time. He says "will make me happy forever”

The only thing on this earth that can make us happy forever is us. We have to find those things that we do, and those people we do them with that make life worth living.

I have a list of things that make me fulfilled and happy— most of them have nothing to do with external metrics:

• My family, friends and people in general
• Thinking about the world on a deeper level, questioning things
• Creating
• Solving problems (for myself, for other people, etc)

Those are some of the things that make me happy on a daily basis.

Now I am not saying that every single day I am this happy gilmore character, but I have worked years to find those and realize that’s what I needed to create meaning.

I encourage you all to have a conversation with yourself on what things matter most to you in life.

Understanding External Validations We Want

Now I’d be foolish if I didn’t acknowledge that people do want power, money and status.

Its human nature.

But these represent something:

Money = security, power, material wealthPower = Being in control, Not reporting to anyoneStatus = Being looked up to, sense of importance

These are underlying motives for wanting those external validations. So if you want money, you most likely value security, stability and material things.

If we shift our perspective to say “Okay so now I don’t need an unlimited money supply, I know I want enough money to provide myself with xyz”

This can help shift external validation to something closer to your heart/mind.

If you made it this far, I hope you were able to take something from this, and feel free to share with someone you think would get value out of this.